Urban and narative poetry, vbog, personal journal
I’m so fortunate to have good friends, eespecially one capable of putting you in your place.
I was reminded recently that I need not hate back the people who may hate me.
I appreciate her, but she is still a crab.
Today I was also reminded that I’m a many times blessed man.
A man of wealth
Can be an ignoramus and
A poor man knowledgeable.
All things being equal,
that’s ridiculous.
I’m not a stranger to homelessness and poverty, but I have never seen so much, where people crap and piss in the streets.
And Mars will never be colonized by people, as long as it is connected to a pocket book, depended on cash to get there.
In one hundred years, Mars will still be mostly barren, sterilized of humanity.
All humanity still on Earth, makin’ .50 cents a day.
While the robots get to go out and play.
How is this for a fear?
I’m reading The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna.
I’m at the part where I must list ten of my fears on a piece of paper. But because I’m commuting on the bus to work, I think about just one fear: the fear of – success(?!!).
I have two or one goal(s) depending on how I look at them: Being about to sustainably write poetry that it earns an income, or earn the income some other way so that I can continue to write poetry.
Like, if successful, I don’t want fame or notoriety to distract me from writing poetry or pursuing my spirituality. Solitude is a good thing, something necessary for someone trying to live a mystical monk-like lifestyle.
Most of the time when I think is this, it look like shadow of something scary but consciously I know to be an old tree bare from being midwinter in Detroit. Upon closer inspection it looks more like laziness, but that’s not true either.
The truth is – I’m slow, chaotic and prone to being distracted.
The sex zombies
have started humping trees and utility polls along Southern Boulevard the streets overrunning with them.
I actually saw zombies humping
a Corvette, thinking the lines on the pickups too conservative.
Behind a gas station hidden from the highway,
Folks gangbang each other with empty pale eyes, men and women, wanting the receiving,
all while they empty themselves of gray matter.
All the prostitutes left a week ago.
I love Women….
But I don’t want an ugly woman
who would betray me, or try to convert me
to a faith
I despise.
I love Men….
Been messin’
with men since 17,
or 8, if you count childhood.
But I don’t do well with men.
The sex is great and
I always want more,
I know I will be moving on.
I’m a whore
looking for
his holy grail,
even if it comes
with it’s own
Empty bed.
09.17.2020
Trying a few different things, and being more open, It would be something akin to a slow motion strip tease of my soul. But, at the very least, I feel freer for it.
I have made some changes in my life, not all of it positive, but living life anyway. I hope I haven’t disturbed anyone too much, and that I hope everyone enjoys my writing.
If I post this right, I will have my new site up and running by the end of this month, 9.30.2020
And thanks for all your support.
So tired,
So tired of this world,
This life,
But I’m told to be grateful
for my life….
of discrimination and
poverty,
of Christians putting crosses
in my mouth,
that I promptly spit out
to the ground.
Some Christians burn crosses,
Killing, lynching black people, gunning them down at church.
It makes me feel sorry for the human race,
But glad I’m no longer….human.
Disavowed….
…..you
fear
the power of
Free women,
independent of
men and your Jesus,
that you try to chain her down
with anti-abortion laws,
limiting access to
prenatal healthcare and
abortion clinics,
banning abortions outright….
the glass ceiling you
created now has cracks.
No worries though,
I’m sure Jesus himself will bar your way before those pearly gates….
May you have
a nice, warm time….
I try not to look at any habit judgementally, because I’m not a classist or trust the word bad or wrong.
I use to do that, judging cigarettes as bad and wrong. I used to be such an anti-cigarettes person I would go to another room or outside to avoid the smoke, then some odd 20 years later I’m trying to use cigarettes as bait in Piedmont Park in Atlanta to attract guys.
I hate cigarettes even more now, because I desire to do something else – to run, to run like a damn gazelle again.
And did just that today, only it was more like a walk than a run, but it felt good.
Today is also the day I let go of sex.
Now, I love sex, (dang! It’s like my spirituality!), I don’t have the right person(s) to practice it with.
The sex thing makes me horny and lonely, which is not good emotionally.
The thing is, part of problem has been dealing with the voids these habits leave behind, so I’m trying something more enriching, running and trading stocks.I’m hoping this works, I need a new direction in my life.
Why do this?
The post can be short or long, a personal intro to your life or a bloggy mission statement, a manifesto for the future or a simple outline of your the types of things you hope to publish.
To help you get started, here are a few questions:
You’re not locked into any of this; one of the wonderful things about blogs is how they constantly evolve as we learn, grow, and interact with one another — but it’s good to know where and why you started, and articulating your goals may just give you a few other post ideas.
Can’t think how to get started? Just write the first thing that pops into your head. Anne Lamott, author of a book on writing we love, says that you need to give yourself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. Anne makes a great point — just start writing, and worry about editing it later.
When you’re ready to publish, give your post three to five tags that describe your blog’s focus — writing, photography, fiction, parenting, food, cars, movies, sports, whatever. These tags will help others who care about your topics find you in the Reader. Make sure one of the tags is “zerotohero,” so other new bloggers can find you, too.
She didn’t know why Her third planet kept getting out of balance, it’s acidity growing and the temperature rising.
She knew She hadn’t paid much attention to it since removing the dinosaurs, then afterwards rebalanced the land and the sea.
Putting Her presence their, She saw humans had appeared and were eating all the woolly mammoths, throwing off the planet’s ph.
Its hard making reality, because as Goddess She had to abided by free will and sentience, so She decided She really didn’t need the mammoths anyway.
She decides to visit the humans because She was horny and hadn’t had sex in thousands of years, and lived among the humans at orgies.
But after ten thousand years She left, because the humans kept falling to their knees to worship Her, while some attacked Her and some of Her friends.
Saddened, She looked on as an onlooker at an automobile accident who could do nothing.
And She sat and watched, until men were trying to remove Roe vs. Wade…..Now She was pissed.
Despite my relatively good life, it’s hard sometimes. Like over hearing Trumpers talk about the protests in Portland. The words I hear are the words ‘riots’, but never the word ‘protests’.
I can only think of this as a kind of self delusion, a lie to the self to justify individual biases.
It reminds me of the book burnings of Nazi Germany, where there you denied reality, and humanity, just to stay alive, or wind up in a labor or death camp alongside the Jews you defended, or shot.
But here, I think it will be worse, because there will be more people to kill or incarcerate.
It will be worse, because in order to believe the propaganda, you will likely have to sell your soul and abandon the word: truth.
Liferaft in the Abyss